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Here’s a quote of the original birthday message containing these principles, which John sent out back when he turned 30:

https://www.mail-archive.com/silklist@lists.hserus.net/msg08...

IMO it’s important that #2 reads “Say nothing behind another's back you'd be unwilling to say, in exactly the same tone and language, to his face.” The shortened form that’s currently circulating doesn’t carry the full meaning.