This is, honestly, a brilliant suggestion!
Instead of trying to legislate social media companies on their terms, this would help in creating 1) a standard of communication across different ones and 2) help in creating better social media platforms.
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I strongly disagree, social graphs are contextual and it makes sense to have different graphs for different social networks. When I friend someone on Facebook I am not agreeing to share some other info with them that I produce on a totally different site. And finding friends is not the hard part of using a new site. The network effect comes from people actually using the site, not from finding your friends, so this wouldn't make social networks more competitive.
It's entirely possible to leave this choice to the user who can determine what information they want to expose to whom while stile maintaining compatible standards for the platforms themselves. This is essentially how the federated Mastodon network already works.
Or for example, facebook, instagram, whatsapp and their new dating service which is all interconnected but optional.
Albeit cumbersome you can choose to share things only with some of your friends of your Facebook account.
You can set up barrier inside the account, you can also setup multiple account.
Like an unlisted phone number?