Who decides if a newspaper is a newspaper or just a tabloid?
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You mean a broadsheet vs a tabloid?
Some newspapers are in a broadsheet format, others in a tabloid format (and some, in other less common formats).
The tabloid format is often used to shock.
Is any of this in dispute?
I don't think anyone's debating your claim. It's a fascinating point of view, and reflects closely to the conveyed image of the matter.
What people are disputing, though, is more closely tied to the story. Right now, many people see NYT and WaPo as NYPost-likes regarding their journalistic rigor.
If it feels like Windows and runs like Windows, but has a different-ish UI, people will treat it like it's Windows-esque even if it's Linux.
Sure - and that's a totally reasonable view. One that I share in large part, in fact.
But there's a reason that publications adopt the tabloid UI, and it's almost always to do shocking, sensationalist journalism. It's a UI that is suited for that format.
Additionally, many other publications do shoddy journalism in different ways, with different formats, and different UIs.