But please don't harm yourself or anyone -- not now, not later.
I have learned for myself that life has purpose and is worthwhile, even when one can't move without pain and it is hard to maintain good thoughts -- such things can be learning experiences that help us move forward later, into the next life, when we will still be ourselves and can take with us the things we have learned and become (on the inside). It is so very worthwhile. I have commented more elsewhere in this discussion.
(edit: s/now/not/ )
I hear it is never lost, lest you're actually dead or in the process of.
So I don't know about that.
I've been struggling with "neurosis-based" depression all my life. They still don't have a cure for that. You know what the medical consensus is? Breathe.
That appeared in 2015.
And I have myself discovered Wim Hoff independently of medical science the year before. That got me started.
Maybe it could get you started too.
<3