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by cainxinth·4y ago·view on hn ↗
This is why I’ve avoided concentrates. I’ve tried (and enjoyed) them all, but I was already concerned that my tolerance to plain old weed was too high. I knew if I got too into wax and shatter, I’d end up chasing the dragon (or at least the weed version of that) and potentially worse (i.e. cannabinoid hyperemesis syndrome).

Concentrates are something I treat myself to just a few times a year. Everything in moderation… including the occasional excess.

2 comments
"but once you get locked into a serious drug collection, the tendency is to push it as far as you can." ― Hunter S. Thompson, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas

I've always liked that quote as I have seen it over and over again in people I know. Those that can use and moderate to just a recreational use vs committing to a full on daily use (addiction by most acceptable use) is very small. I love to partake when I have the time and lack of responsibilities requiring all of my faculties. But when I've tried the daily use and watched my capabilities diminish has shown me that I'm not fully functional with that daily use so I just keep it in the recreational realm. From my 100% unschooled medical perspective, those that think they are 100% with daily use are just lying to themselves.

Yeah. I wish that we determined who the actual "junkie" is on a case-by-case basis, not by the fact of consumption alone. I medicate for the same reasons mentally sick people do, but I actually have a physical brain damage and my limbic system might be the region affected along with many others. I am able to treat the mental issues, and the same medication happens to help with the incontinence I have. If I told anyone about it, they would consider me a junkie. I do not even get high from it, for fuck's sake. It makes me more neutral, otherwise I'm an emotional wreck, full of suicidal thoughts that I end up acting on eventually as I used to.

I go through intentional withdrawal every N months to reduce my tolerance. I tend to keep the dose as low as possible. Sometimes I fail, sometimes I do not. I might buy that box that has a lock with a timer on it or something. ^^

I do not consider myself a junkie just because I am dependent on it, similarly how people are not junkies for depending on beta-blockers. They need it, and I need it too. It just happens to be something some people tend to abuse. Well, I do not wish to suffer because of them. Again, I do not get high, I do not get any of those feelings that would make me crave it. Many people might, but many people do not have the same medical condition as I do, I guess.

As I said, I am not "100% with daily use". I sometimes fail at controlling the dose, because sometimes my issues are worse, but... I wish I did not have to depend on it. It fucking sucks. I do not want to depend on it, but I have tried every psychiatric medications there is during my years... None of them helped one bit. I had no idea that what I am taking would work either, I stumbled upon it by accident. Again, I wish I did not need this, but I am afraid I will die taking it unless they find a proper treatment or cure for what I have. But yeah... it sucks. I could talk about it more, like how I cannot even get out of bed and do my damn job without it and such, but welp.

Is it an amphetamine/upper?
No, that would make things worse for me.
I switched to shatter because it was much cheaper at the quantities I was doing. Then one day I was disgusted by the whole situation and went back to flower. I didn't like the idea of needing to use a blow torch to smoke shatter out of a crack pipe. Too many real life responsibilities and just getting too old for that.