Enlist and get your top secret clearance managing LANs and teaching officers how to add images into PowerPoints, they said. You’ll never be unemployed. Then you realize the “job” mostly involves being a disposable cog in some ex-colonel’s endless PowerPoint war. Every meeting feels like a high-stakes reenactment of “Yes, sir,” where accountability is optional and speaking up is career suicide. Billion-dollar mistakes are brushed off as “lessons learned,” while you get a lecture about integrity. It’s the world’s most expensive game of “the emperor has no clothes,” except everyone’s wearing lanyards and classified guilt.