> Nothing should be forced or suppressed, that is antithetical to wu wei or any idea of balance/equilibrium.
Your understanding of balance/equilibrium is not quite correct. There is a concept called "Egoless Action" in Hindu Philosophies. Every living being is always and continuously engaged in action, defined as state changes in Mental/Verbal/Physical (note all three) domains. Activity is synonymous with Life itself. But a wise-man/monk/yogi trains to do this "egolessly" i.e. without reference to gain/loss for his "personal self". Because all action impinges on the external environment there is always change i.e. things vary with some getting enhanced while others get suppressed. This then gets back to you as "Karma" (i.e. the fruits of the action which nobody can escape) since we and the external environment are two parts of the universal whole. This is why you are advised to focus on "Right Action" i.e. that which is in accordance with "Dharma". The vast majority of people are "normal" (i.e. selfish and egoistic) and therefore engage in all sorts of activities which result in both good and bad karma and thus suffer happiness or unhappiness accordingly. The monk/yogi understands the difference and acts egolessly to break out of the "cycle of samsara" (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sa%E1%B9%83s%C4%81ra) and thus achieves mental equanimity, freedom from extremes and is said to be in balance/equilibrium w.r.t. the world.
"Wu Wei" (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wu_wei) explains the same idea in a different form.
> but the wisdom is severely lacking. If you dedicate your life energy to work on a nuclear submarine, which has as its purpose to launch retaliatory strikes in an all out nuclear conflict, what does that say about your wisdom? And wisdom is the main thing we should take away from all these teachings. The meditation, calmness, focus etc...those are all secondary products.
Your idea of "Wisdom" here is not quite right. Wisdom is the ability to make the "Right Decision" in any environment at all times and engage in "Right Action" appropriate to that environment and instant. It involves all Moral(personal)/Ethical(societal)/Practical issues and concerns. In the case of a nuclear sub, the practical reason is acting as a deterrent to support the ethical reason of protecting society which is acceptable to an individual moral sense. Hence my point about "righteous and just war".
> This is my understanding, and the gripe i have is with westerners using eastern philosophy to "improve their productivity" or "become better leaders", that is not the point and in my opinion close to blasphemy.
This is exactly the wrong way to think about Philosophy. Philosophy is the most practical of all disciplines since its goal is to help us live and flourish in this society and world. There are many ways of doing it depending on your chosen "worldview" but there are some absolutes which crosscut all of them. The main thing is not to get lost in "other-worldly" ideas (which is the main problem with most people) but apply it correctly to our everyday lives.
For example, there is no external heaven vs. hell but merely mental states where you experience/ruminate on good vs bad thoughts/feelings/emotions. Everything is only the "Mind" and its various manifestations. The techniques developed to control/manage/modify/transform the mind by the monks/yogis are very practical and should be used in your everyday life whatever your goals might be. The problem you are talking about is the charlatans/hucksters in the west who with zero/half-baked knowledge of the above are bent on exploiting the ignorant populace. The solution is to study/educate yourself and share it with others.