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by gmays·11y ago·view on hn ↗
- Learn to say "I'm sorry."

- In arguments being right isn't as important as being happy.

- Be nice, especially to people who can't do anything for you.

- Be grateful.

- Figure out what you want in this life and go for it, it's the only one you get.

- Do as much for your body as you do for your mind (i.e. workout, eat well).

- Learn to manage money.

- Stop doing stupid shit (you know what I'm talking about).

- Make decisions using the regret minimization framework. What would you regret NOT doing the most? Do that.

- Invest in yourself. You can lose everything, but you'll always have this.

- Don't watch the news.

- Don't be an asshole.

- Do be happy, you deserve it.

It's ok, we're works in progress.

3 comments
All good, except "don't watch the news". Watch the news. Learn more about the world around you and what's going on with other people. Just don't watch sensationalist news that is more about capturing eyeballs than imparting information.

The "works in progress" is a very good point to make.

I agree with you, but I prefer to read the news than to watch--it gives me more control over what I consume and how I interpret. Not a big fan of TV in general.
Agreed. Also, any given article also has about 10x more actual information than the 45 second TV news blip (or longer NPR segment for that matter).
The test before reading/watching news is "would I read/watch this if it was a week old?" If you wouldn't, don't waste your time on it now.
> Make decisions using the regret minimization framework. What would you regret NOT doing the most? Do that.

It's not a bad question to ask for considering different angles, but I disagree that it should have much influence. It discourages risk-taking.

I know it's a popular meme but when people say they have no regrets, I think to myself that either 1) They are bullsh-g me (usually the case), 2) they are bullsh-g themselves, often by closing their eyes to what they missed on, and/or 3) they aren't taking enough risks.

Regret and pain are part of life. It's a fantasy, and emotionally immature, to think you will avoid them or that you have.

"May your reach exceed your grasp."

That's odd - I always thought that 'regret minimisation' meant taking risks and NOT taking the safe option which you might later regret.

If you take a risk and it doesn't work out, you can still have no regrets because (a) it was the right thing to with the available information at the time; (b) you learnt something valuable from the experience.

I guess it depends on your OS.

Minimizing regrets to me means taking risks. It's why I joined the Marine Corps. It's why I bought my first house at 21. It's why I got married. It's why I started investing in real estate. It's why I quit my job to start a company.

If I didn't work to minimize my regrets I'd have a very dull life. Do I use it to decide whether I want Chinese or Italian? No, but when I have a major decision and I'm having a hard time deciding I give it a spin.

That whole topic always rubs me the wrong way. Taking risks could mean catching aids and dying, falling off the cliff, getting in racing accident, going bankrupt, etc... Except we don't hear the stories of those who risked and died or failed, only those who risked and succeeded.

I'm not saying you shouldn't take risks. I just have no idea how you can come up with rule or guideline that has any basis in reality. There are tons of people who took some risk and are living with the negative repercussions but we rarely like hearing about them.

You're thinking too hard about it. It's just like how guns don't come with a label that says, "Don't shoot yourself."

If you struggle with how to use regret minimization I'd say just see the rule above it: "Stop doing stupid shit." Your examples of "catching aids and dying, falling off the cliff, getting in racing accident, going bankrupt" mostly fall under doing stupid shit with the possible exception of going bankrupt, which could be due to bad luck (but is most often a result of doing stupid shit.)

People get in over their heads because they risk more than they're willing to lose and fail to think long-term, which is stupid shit. And often it's not just one bad decision, but a series of bad decisions that lead to catastrophic outcomes. I became a millionaire in my 20's by taking risks, but I never risked more than I was willing to lose--financially or in my marriage.

There's not a rule or decision framework for everything, at some point it comes down to common sense and judgement(which can be improved through learning). And even with our best efforts we'll make mistakes, which is expected. But it's ok to make a thousand small mistakes, you just have to avoid the big ones...like catching aids and dying, falling off the cliff, getting in racing accident...

It's not a recipe, it's a rough trajectory: some assembly (thought) required.

> It discourages risk-taking.

People can also regret not having taken a risk - so it works both ways.

But I think "regret minization" is more than just avoiding negative consequences. It's about not regreting a decision even if things go wrong - it's about being able to say "I'd do it again".

Don't watch the news? Care to elaborate? You mean politics etc or generally any news including tech and science?
Not parent, but I agree and can explain my thoughts. If a topic is really new, it's inherently not generally well understood. Therefore the reporting on it is likely to be inaccurate, misleading, and missing some really important bits. Even the choice of what to report on is made without good understanding.

Have you ever read a news article about a subject in your field that you knew a lot about? Think about it. Remember how everything was a little bit off or a little misleading or misinformed or focused on the wrong thing? That's the case with every news article, ever, we just don't think about it most of the time.

For anything really important you'll find out about it quickly enough. Someone you know will tell you or you'll overhear something. Trying to search for important information by reading or watching news reports feels good because it satisfies our instincts to hunt and search and collect. But it's not a good use of our energy 99% of the time.

HN is a bit "meta". Here we search not for useful or important news articles, but for insightful, intelligent comments from people who actually understand what is going on. The 99% rule still applies, but at least when we find a comment like that here it is more likely to be well-informed and something we wouldn't find elsewhere.

"Avoid News" by Rolf Dobelli

http://dobelli.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/08/Avoid_News_Par...

I don't know if I get that right but from where I come, "watch the news" means mostly watch it on TV. So it might not have something to do with reading IT news on HN for example...
I prefer to read the news than to watch--it gives me more control over what I consume and how I interpret it. I don't watch much TV aside from the odd sports game here and there.